


When you gonna own up (that you've got it bad)

by brightestplanet



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Boys In Love, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Han is stupid, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining, Qi'ra left a lot of bad feelings about love for Han you can't tell me otherwise, han is bad at feelings, please be nice I am dumb, sort of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:15:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25903444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brightestplanet/pseuds/brightestplanet
Summary: Han Solo, despite being confident and charismatic is bad at feelings. He struggles with the budding feels he has for Luke Skywalker. Basically Han is stupid and Pining.
Relationships: Luke Skywalker/Han Solo
Comments: 6
Kudos: 127





	When you gonna own up (that you've got it bad)

**Author's Note:**

> Title from I won't say I'm in love from the Disney movie hercules......
> 
> This is my first fic on here and it's unbeta'd and poorly written but I wrote it on a whim.

Luke Skywalker made him want to be a better person. Han Solo wasn't exactly good but Luke made him want to be better. Luke made him smile, he made him want to stay every time he smiled at him. Luke made him feel funny. It was good though, the blonde made him feel warm and dizzy. 

He'd asked Luke to fly away with him. The damn kid had been too brave to run with him. Maybe Han was stupid, maybe he was a coward but he'd rather leave and lose any chance than be rejected. Rejected for what though? He didn't have real feelings for Luke. He chalked the butterflies he felt up to the fact that he hadn't eaten anything but a ration bar in the last twenty four hours. Han was supposed to be an adult, thirty Kriffing years old and he couldn't handle a crush or taking care of himself. 

Han, lost in the confines his own mind had to do repairs on the falcon before Chewie got too angry with him but every second his mind thought of him. He was so good. He was so beautiful and perfect and...shit. He needed to get it together. He couldn't be thinking like this. The last time he felt like this…no. He couldn't do this, not today. 

He'd promised he'd do a scouting mission for Leia, he was expendable. Of course he was. How could he not be expendable? At least he had Luke to dream about as he tightened a bolt that had come loose. 

Then he heard it, "Hey, Han? You here?" That was his voice. 

Han hit his head, jumped by the sound of Luke's voice as he tried to get out of the hole that he'd opened in the floor of the ship. He pulled himself out, pulling his goggles up off his eyes and to his hair. He quickly pulled himself together, "What's up, kid?" He asked cooly. 

"Leia wanted me to see what time you wanted to leave tomorrow." The kid smiled at him, his blue eyes shining and Han's heart sank. He couldn't do this. The gravitational pull of Luke Skywalker was stronger than that of a black hole. He couldn't do this. 

"Early, I wanna be back as soon as I can be" Han looked at the chrono he'd recently mounted to the wall of the Falcon, he had time. 

Luke gave another smile, nodding. "What are you up to?" 

"Needed to replace a couple of loose bolts." The smuggler shrugged, dropping back into the floor so he could escape Luke's constantly intense blue eyes. "Don't you have somewhere to be, kid?"

"Nah, I just got off patrol," He shrugged as he leaned to look at what Han was doing now. The gaze made Han's knees weak even if he had his back turned to him now. 

Han was working again now, checking everything he could just to be able to try to see if it would make Luke leave him alone. He couldn't focus with him right there. 

Luke was silent for a moment, "Have you eaten?" He asked. 

"No."

"Okay, then...come get dinner with me?"

"No."

Luke huffed above Han, then he was suddenly next to him in the small space. "When did you last eat?" He asked. 

"Earlier." Han said, going ridgid. Luke was so close. He was so close to him. Han had to keep his very slim self control in check or else he would do something stupid. 

Luke gave him a look before he was climbing out just as quickly as he had gotten down, he held a hand out to Han, "C'mon, please?"

The smuggler was weak for the farmboy so he reluctantly took his hand for help up and abandoned his work to follow him out of the ship and to the mess hall. It wasn't too crowded, he wasn't thrilled about that. He and Luke could sit alone together at a table. He didn't like the feeling that gave him. He couldn't feel anything for him...he was perfect and beautiful and compassionate and...way out of his league. How could an amazing Jedi love a man like Han? The answer was, he couldn't.

They ate in silence. Han was normally so confident and he was normally so interested in pursuing hookups but Luke scared him. He didn't want to even admit to himself how he was feeling but he knew he couldn't escape it. 

"Walk me to my room?" Luke asked after they had taken care of the mess they'd made at the table. Han weakly nodded, there was a lump in his throat that was forming. 

They had fallen into step on their way down the hall and out of the mess hall and into the more residential part of the base. He trailed after the blonde like a lost puppy. He kept thinking about Luke's lips and kriff, Luke was pouting about something. Han would have done anything to be able to kiss that look away. 

"Han?" Luke asked as they approached his room, "are you okay?"

Han realized now that he was frowning himself, "I'm okay, just thinking." He said. 

Luke didn't seem satisfied but when they stopped in front of his door he keyed in the code and gestured as if to invite Han in. Han didn't want to. But he did anyways. He entered with his heart hammering and when the door closed behind him, he turned to look at Luke and shook his head.

"Look, kid...I think I need to be honest with you." What was he doing? He couldn't do this. His whole body betrayed him as he took a step closer to Luke, "I've been thinking about you a lot." What a weak confession. Han couldn't do this. Not with Luke. His normal confidence was lost when Luke was involved, when love was involved. 

"In what context?"

"Not a friend context?" The words tasted like sand on Han's tongue. 

Luke was right in front of him within seconds, taking Han's face in his hands and kissing him sweetly. It lacked finesse and it was so messy but it was better than he had ever imagined. Kissing Luke was like a breath of fresh air after he'd been holding his breath since... Qi'ra. It was as if Luke had given him the oxygen he needed to live again. To love again. 

After a second, Han pulled back, panting but looking sad, "I'm sorry, kid…"

"No, Han, I'm so sorry- I didn't mean to take that out of context or take that the wrong way, I just assumed-"

Han cut him off with another kiss. Then he muttered, "No, I'm just...I'm sorry, I wanted to be honest that I'm really terrible at this kinda thing."

"I've never had this kinda thing, Han...it's okay."

"My luck with love is just bad."

"You love me?"

Han froze with his hands settled on Luke's waist. Then he took a deep breath and it was like a weight had been lifted from his chest and he was able to finally relax again. "Yeah, I do."

And he meant it. He meant that. Love may be hard but he loved Luke Skywalker.

**Author's Note:**

> uh I hope this didn't SUCK


End file.
